Keeping new years resolutions is hard. For that reason, my 2017 resolutions were simple:

Be happy.
Stay Strong.
Love.

I can confidently say there were points all throughout the year where I accomplished all of those things, but there were certainly times when I did not follow those rules–and that’s okay. It’s too damn hard to keep it together all the time and if I’m not okay with that, well then that diminishes my happiness and strength and I’m back to square one.

We all need to find a way to keep ourselves mentally strong and the above resolutions were developed around just that–my emotional stability. I also snuck in a resolution centered on my physical ability:

Learn to juggle.

I began my juggling journey eager and with a great deal of confidence until I realized what a challenge it would be, and as with most resolutions, I slowly but surely gave up, moved on, and pushed it to the back of my mind. That’s to say, I forgot about it until about three weeks out from the new year.

Being someone who hates to fall short of physical goals I set for myself, I panicked­–hard-core panicked. I was determined to meet this goal come hell or high water. From that moment on, I spent time each day practicing–uncontrollably bouncing balls (or fruit) off walls, counters, floors, and my face, but even with all that practice, December 31st showed no progress–just the sound of limes smacking the floor, which annoyed my husband to no end.

Halfway through the day, I switched to spiky dryer balls and about 15 minutes before the clock struck midnight, for the first time (and with much encouragement and help from my husband), I was able to keep two balls in the air for seven to ten consecutive rotations!!! I’d found success–one marked by limited time, growing pressure, dents in the floor and my face. The greatest kind.

Although mission accomplished, it taught me (or reminded me once again) that even goals that seem attainable, (like 365 days to keep two objects in the air for a very short amount of time) can fall short of success if one is not resolute. More importantly, we humans never reach our full potential by cramming. I’m sure with a little practice each day (slow and steady) I could have joined the circus or at least met my goal with more confidence and pride. My speedy shortcut certainly got me to my goal but in no way did it represent perfection.

To wrap up:

In 2017, I was happy for moments. I stayed strong as best I could. And I certainly loved. I also learned to juggle–maybe not as defined by Barnum & Bailey but certainly as defined by Siri.

Since all of that worked out so well, I have chosen new challenges for 2018.

My goals to strengthen my emotional stability are:

Recognize good moments. (There will be plenty of them.)
Do not be paralyzed by sadness or pain. (It will come but it will pass.)

My physical ability resolution will remain a secret unless of course, I succeed. If my character and determination prove strong, you will find out next year. Until then, slow and steady my friends.

God bless you all in 2018!

For your viewing pleasure, here are some stills of some of my many failed attempts…